I have stressed my concern a lot with social media and its role in how we perceive ourselves. In my post Competition and Comparisons I talk about the competition that social media brings to life for us, and how important it is for us not to get sucked into it. In my post Despite The Wrong, You’re Still Headed Right I talk about how we can feel pressure from people on social media, even those we barely know, and it tends be bring negative perceptions of our own lives and where we are.
In this post, I want to turn the tables for a moment. It’s May. Most of you who read this are finishing up another year of college of graduate school, some of you are even graduating (!!!!). Some of you are content with a stable work life and some of you are in the midst of deciding between job offers. Some of you are looking forward to exciting summer plans while others are still figuring out what they are going to do. Whatever your situation is, there’s always something exciting happening. It could be next weekend, next month, in the Fall, or something that you are currently celebrating.
I, myself, just got an unbelievable internship this summer with Huffington Post in NYC. So, why can’t I celebrate it? I can and I should….and you should be allowed to celebrate/be happy about whatever is going on with you too.
I think it’s perfectly okay to post publicly a celebration or an exciting offer/plan going on in your life. We share photos of our newborn babies, statuses about new, exciting opportunities, notes about graduation and who/what we will miss, statuses about engagements and new relationships etc. As long as you aren’t posting your celebrations or exciting offers/plans to see if ‘so and so’ will notice or to gain public validation or to hurt somebody then it’s fine. Your social media accounts are yours alone. No, you don’t NEED to post anything to feel a certain way about yourself, and you don’t NEED other people to know what’s going on but if you WANT to share with your world amazing news, so what. Right?
Or am I wrong? From the standpoint of a person who can easily see both sides to every story….I want your opinion.
I think like mentioned in my post stated above, Competitions and Comparisons, that there is a huge double standard and a Facebook/social media illusion. We can share the good things but preferably not the bad because it becomes too personal. We can read other people’s great lives but not see what’s going wrong with them. This leads us to come off as superficial, fake, or even bragging if you are sharing great things, or it leads us to feel bad, negative, and disappointed in ourselves when our feed is being spammed with everybody else’s greatness.
What are your thoughts on sharing things on social media? It’s great to share with your world everything that’s going right, but when things are going wrong how come it’s TMI or inappropriate to share breakups, negative thoughts or problems? Is it only okay if you really are only on their to connect with real friends and not just network with anybody? But If you become my friend or follow me or read what I write then is it safe to say that you are interested in what’s going on in my life, good or bad?
Does social media permit a constant sense of seeking attention? Is that always necessarily bad? Is there a way to escape it?
I share my exciting news because after all, social media is a place where everybody can have a say, share their story, make a public opinion or express their passions. It’s lovely. I share my favorite songs which tend to be slower songs that don’t usually express my emotions. I have favorite quotes that will sometimes relay my thoughts and struggles. But really, where is the line to be drawn between sharing too much, good or bad, on social media?
What are your thoughts on this issue?
S.K.
Congrats on the internship! I personally like hearing and sharing good news, in order to celebrate together. I understand that the potential competitive nature of social media can actually make people feel invaluable, though. I have friends who refuse to be on social media, because they want to be authentic (both good and bad) to the people they know. (By the way, I mentioned your great blog on my post: http://jenniferjchow.blogspot.com/2012/05/wulung-adapt-for-success.html)
I love the questions you brought up. I think people are generally scared to post anything that could be perceived as a problem. The courage it takes to share a fault is proportional to the reward received when accepted. Its just the thought of denial that keeps us from taking this naked leap of faith. Denial, something we fear to the point of cringing. Just sit there and imagine feeling denied to something, anything, and your body has a gut-wrenching twitch. The need to sympathize usually outweighs the urge to destroy, especially on todays socially accountable facebook. Trust me when I say that nobody is going to bash you for writing something sad, but at the end of the day are people really writing what they believe or what they feel is acceptable? The lack of eye contact in the end is the true culprit. Because as long as there is an “Enter” key between my thoughts and your mind, the lack of authenticity will remain. A picture may hold a thousand words, but eyes can relay a lifetime.